A thorn bush.

Have you ever been so comfortable with the way things were, that you had failed to see all the warning signs and events to follow?  Even as they were happening, you still felt a comfort in knowing that things would always be the same.  Things so terrible and to most, unimaginable that such things could happen between individuals.  I guess you just reach a point where you accept the comfort, the horrific events and chatter, and get settled in for the long haul; because that's all you think that you deserve in life.  So much for happiness, it's  over-rated anyway.  We just want to live day to day SURVIVING, hoping that you're getting somewhere at some point. 

What if I told you that you could leave?  True happiness and fulfillment is possible, all you need to do is take that first step.  Enough.  No more living in a thorn covered comfort.  You deserve so much more than the thorn bush you've been living in.  Now you're free.  You can move wherever you had wanted to in the past, before you settled into the thorns for the season.  You can do anything you set your mind to.

However, you will hit days like today where you feel fine and act normal when around others; but behind the closed doors you are still trying to rise out of the thorn bushes.  They grew around you, and segments of your clothing are still attached.  Luckily, you can shed the branches and thorns off your clothes, but you may have some scratches that stick around for awhile, even a lifetime.  You just need to make it out of the thorn bush before the branches grow around you in the next season. 

When you do leave, it feels like a funeral.  At least for me, it feels so unreal and so unattached because the person isn't there anymore.  I know we had a past, memories, and some things that will last a lifetime.  But that doesn't mean that I need to mourn the death.  I can appreciate the past and move forward.  I can miss the old times, and even cry about the good memories.  I will not choose to mourn the bad memories.  They're not worth anything to me.  Isn't that what we do when people die?  We forgive the bad blood in the past, so that we can finally move forward in our future.  I choose to do that with my time.  Forgive the crap, and keep the good memories...but I will not forget the scratches from the thorn bush because they're a daily reminder of how nasty things were when I was stuck in the branches.  I will never return to that thorn bush, or another for that purpose.   I'll stick to the path and keep moving forward.

We Were Meant to be Courageous. 8.10.14 It's the beginning of something great.

Final speech from Courageous:

As a law-enforcement officer, I’ve seen firsthand the deep hurt and devastation that fatherlessness brings in a child’s life. Our prisons are full of men and women who lived recklessly after being abandoned by their fathers, wounded by the men who should have loved them the most. Many now follow the same pattern of irresponsibility that their fathers did.

While so many mothers have sacrificed to help their children survive, they were never intended to carry the weight alone. We thank God for them.

But research is proving that a child also desperately needs a daddy. There’s no way around this fact. As you know, earlier this year, my family endured the tragic loss of our -year-old daughter, Emily. Her death forced me to realize that not only had I not taken advantage of the priceless time I had with her, but that I did not truly understand how crucial my role was as a father to her and our son, Dylan. Since her passing, I’ve asked God to show me, through his word how to be the father that I need to be.

I now believe that God desires for every father to courageously step up and do whatever it takes to be involved in the lives of his children. But more than just being there or providing for them, he’s to walk with them through their lives and be a visual representation of the character of God, their father in heaven.

A father should love his children and seek to win their hearts. He should protect them, discipline them and teach them about God.
He should model how to walk with integrity and treat others with respect and should call out his children to become responsible men and women who live their lives for what matters in eternity.

Some men will hear this and mock it or ignore it.
But I tell you that as a father, you are accountable to God for the position of influence he has given you.
You can’t fall asleep at the wheel only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value but the souls of your children do.

Some men will hear this and agree with it but have no resolve to live it out.
lnstead, they will live for themselves and waste the opportunity to leave a godly legacy for the next generation.

But there are some men who, regardless of the mistakes we’ve made in the past, regardless of what our fathers did not do for us, will give the strength of our arms and the rest of our days to loving God with all that we are and to teach our children to do the same, and, whenever possible, to love and mentor others who have no father in their lives but who desperately need help and direction.

We are inviting any man whose heart is willing and courageous to join us in this resolution.
In my home, the decision has already been made.
You don’t have to ask who will guide my family, because by God’s grace, I will.
You don’t have to ask who will teach my son to follow Christ, because l will.
Who will accept the responsibility of providing and protecting my family? I will.
Who will ask God to break the chain of destructive patterns in my family’s history? I will.
Who will pray for and bless my children to boldly pursue whatever God calls them to do?
I am their father. l will.

I accept this responsibility, and it is my privilege to embrace it.
I want the favor of God and his blessing on my home.
Any good man does.
So where are you, men of courage?
Where are you, fathers who fear the Lord?
It’s time to rise up and answer the call that God has given to you and to say, “I will. I will. I will.”

As a mother, I will.  Starting "The Resolution:  For Women" today. 08.10.14

I will keep you all posted as I read mostly every day.  I am so intrigued by the movie, book, and lifestyle.  I DO matter to my children and I DO matter in their futures.  It's time to start digging deep in order to raise great people.

The American Dream: To Be Successful

I was listening to the Daily Dirt on KAFE 104.1 this morning...I was SO setback by the man who is raising $30,000 for Kenny Loggins to sing to him in his living room. Really?! Couldn't you think of something better to do with $30,000? Also, Kanye and Kim Kardashian just spent $14 million or something like that on a new house with 2 swimming pools, 2 spas, etc etc. This is what is considered "successful" in America: how many pools and spas you have. Then I was just scrolling through my feed and a video containing intense child abuse started to play. Why would you waste $30,000 or $14 million on something so selfish, when you could help a good cause or donate to a center that helps abuse victims? I am SO utterly shocked by people in this world and how selfish they are, and how selfish I am- to be honest.  Sure, I talk every day about how I want a new Toyota Sienna with leather interior and all the fixings; and how I want to live on the lake in a 4 bedroom house so we can take our boat out (and jet skis, obviously) on hot days so I don't have to suffer too much from the 3 weeks a year that we have hot weather.  I also feel entitled to drive-thru coffee on my so-called "low" days-low on energy, low on self-esteem, low on love, and low on faith.  That last one is important to this entire conversation with myself.  I realized that I am so selfish because I do not rely on my faith to see me through.  If I had the faith that everything will work out in my life, no matter what happens-I wouldn't need a minivan or house on the lake to fulfill my American dream.  I wouldn't need a daily coffee, or even  that my household needs certain things for me to feel adequate in my life.  I would feel content.  Everything will work out.  I should use my time on Earth for good, not for self fulfillment.  It's as easy as that, really. Really?!  Then I peer into the Daily Dirt stories, and I realize that it is just THAT easy.  I need to have faith every day that I already have a path set for me-I just need to find it and follow it.  Following it with love as the leader.  Content, loving,and giving are the feelings that would show up next in my life.  Anyway,the point of the story is that we need to all feel content in our lives, then the fulfillment will begin!  Now that I've realized I need to get over myself, I am now becoming more aware of the world activities.  Even if I don't want to know about something happening because it hurts my heart, I have realized that I need to know about it anyway-I need to be aware.  This world we live in isn't always rainbows and sunshine.  Making myself aware helps other people in the world. Take the child abuse video for example-I know kids are abused daily...but nothing hurts more than holding your own child close to make her comfortable, and simultaneously seeing another child (similar in age) experience abuse from their own loved ones. It breaks my heart, fills me with anger, and drives my ambition all at the same time. I want to help people.  I want to help  babies who are being abused and neglected.  I want to help a cause, to see an effect.  I don't have $30,000, $14 million, or even $300 to shell out to a cause.  I will donate what I can though.  My time is important.  Using networking for a cause I believe in is important.  These two connect to Facebook and media. Think about the Kenny Loggins example-why not use networking for a good cause?  Why can't the guy raise the money for abuse shelters?  Why can't Kenny Loggins use his fame and this "living room performance" money, and donate it to something he believes in?  Bring awareness, people.  Oh, and Kimye-or whatever people call you these days-I understand that you need a roof over your head...we all do.  Thank you for making me realize that simple is better.  Having a small house isn't a bad thing.  It leaves more time, money, and resources for me to focus on something better that helps others. (My kids can share a room-hell, it'll bring them closer together in the long run!) Houses can burn or be torn down-it's really just a shell to protect the pearl inside.  Focus more on the pearl,that's what makes life so amazing!
I guess what I'm saying about the American Dream is that you can try to fill it with things...but in the long run it's the love in your life that truly matters-that will be the fulfillment of your dream.  Your kids & family, how you help others, and what you do to leave a legacy behind (even if it's a small one!), are what truly matters. Make a difference in someone's life, and remember: baby steps always grow into larger footprints!